


feel like you been kinda lost up in your mind

by mahirukoizumi



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Comfort, Fluff, M/M, also there's sheet masking, and like skin care in general, i mean there is but not significant, its chill lol, no i do not know how to tag sorry, tags will be added as i update, there's no hurt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-25
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-19 11:57:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11897265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mahirukoizumi/pseuds/mahirukoizumi
Summary: Out of the bunch, Keith had been the most vocal about not wanting to lead Voltron, but things don’t always go the way we planned them. Black had chosen him as her pilot, so he had no choice but to follow after Shiro’s steps. It was after this that Lance noticed two things about Keith.1. He hasn't being doing so great.2. He's acting... a lot softer?Lance decided to take this matter into his hands. Bonding time ensues.





	feel like you been kinda lost up in your mind

**Author's Note:**

> hey everyone! this is literally my first fanfic ever. it started as something to destress myself and i just kept going because it was very fun! but also hard. so hard. anyway, this is very simple, but i thought it was cute. i'm a fan of masks and skincare in general lol and i think lance would be, too. this is set up after Shiro finally comes back. as we all remember, black rejected him *cough*becauseheisfake*cough* so ya boy keith was forced to keep piloting her.  
> a n y w a y, as i mentioned, it's my first time writing anything so constructive criticism is greatly appreciated!  
> edit: this isn't beta'd so if you spot any mistake please let me know!  
> edit 2: (sept. 6) hey guys just wanted to let you know that the next chapter(s) might take me a while longer than expected. shortly after posting this first chapter, school resumed and i also started a part-time job and bc of this my mental health and motivation have taken its toll, not to mention i barely have any free time left. i didn't want to let any of y'all hanging but i need a few weeks to adjust to this until i can write again and produce content that i can be proud of. sorry for the inconvenience and hope to be back soon ;;  
> 

_i need some motivation lately_  
_feel like you been kinda lost up in your mind_  
_feelings you can't hide_  
_when we're two sick souls with the same disease_

Black had chosen Keith as her pilot. Everyone was pretty relieved when every empty place was sorted out. Everyone but Keith. He had been the most vocal about not wanting to be the leader. Shiro trusted him, yes, but he wasn’t ready. He couldn’t lead. Not without Shiro there, and not with him either. After Shiro came back, he thought he had been freed from the burden of leading, but the odds were definitely not in his favour. It was after Keith became Voltron’s leader that Lance noticed two things about him.

The first one, Keith wasn’t doing so great. It was common knowledge among everyone in the castle that he barely slept, since more than once he’d been found lying in bed fully clothed and holding his knife under his pillow. (“Keith, I know you are a good kid but I swear to god if you don’t stop sleeping with that knife I—” “Just watch me, Takashi.”) Until recently, this crazy sleeping schedule seemed to work for him, he could function normally with less than three hours of sleep per night —something unthinkable for Lance, who wouldn’t even dare disrupt his eight-hour beauty sleep. But now, it seemed the responsibility of leading Voltron had taken a toll on him. The dark circles under his eyes were much more prominent than usual and, because their rooms were pretty close to each other, Lance could sometimes actually hear him muttering about whatever was bothering him while he paced back and forth through the castle’s hallways for hours until he (finally!) gave it up and continued to overwork his mind in the privacy of his room.

As happy as Lance wanted to be about everything being silent once again and being able to fall asleep, he was actually worried. Keith was an impulsive hot-headed idiot, he knew that he wasn’t as emotionally stunted as he once believed, but he had never seen (or heard) him this anxious. Yeah, they’d had kind of a _talk_ after Keith realized Lotor had tricked them, and he gained some confidence as a leader, but Lance was no fool. He could tell how much Keith still doubted himself, almost as much as Lance did whenever he felt like a seventh wheel.

So Keith wasn’t getting much sleep, but it didn’t seem to be affecting his leadership or their teamwork whatsoever. He really was good at hiding how much he was struggling, because no one else had picked it up, let alone mentioned it. So much so that Keith’s mental state wasn’t even the one that altered the team’s sync –it was usually because of Lance’s insecurities or Pidge being worried about her family’s whereabouts, or even Hunk who also missed his family deeply. Keith had gotten pretty good at concealing his feelings. _Am I the only one who knows?_ Lance wondered. They hadn’t started off in the best of terms, but they had gradually become closer. Had Keith changed? Maybe both of them did.

And that’s the second thing he noticed: due to the lack of sleep, Keith _was_ acting different. In spite of how anxious he’d get during the night, during the day he appeared a lot less guarded and rigid, not so ready to jump the gun whenever Lance teased him, as if he was trying to compensate for his insecurities. As if he was trying to gain the team’s approval. Lance could tell he was trying his best to improve as a leader. He’d sometimes ask mostly Allura and Pidge for their inputs, maybe Hunk’s, too. Hell, he even asked for Lance’s opinions from time to time. To be completely honest, he was actually acting kind of… soft? _No, no, no, Keith isn’t “soft”, what the fuck?_ _No matter how different he’s acting, he’d kill me with his bare hands if he heard me._ Anyway, Keith’s change in attitude along with his sleep deprived face made him seem much more approachable and a bit vulnerable. And cute. _Actually, I don’t think I’d mind if he tried to kill me_.

Okay, maybe Lance had officially lost his mind.

“Hey man, you doing okay over there? You’ve been cleaning the same spot for like ten minutes.”

“Oh, Hunk. Yeah, it’s just…” _Okay, Lance, think fast, you can’t tell him you were thinking about Keith. Don’t screw this up._ “I’m kinda tired, I guess? I don’t see the point of cleaning the whole castle once a week when we literally use one fifth of the space in it? We could be, you know, actually resting on our free days or… I don’t know, training? Maybe?”

“Training. Alright. Are you sure you’re okay? That was very… _Keith_ of you.”

“Ha ha, very funny Hunk, why would I be thinking of Keith?” _I done fucked up._

“Lance, listen, you don’t have to pretend you hate Keith. I know, and I’m pretty sure Shiro has noticed, alright and Coran, too…”

“N-noticed what?”

“Lance.”

“Hunk,” he deadpanned.

“Listen. You were making your Keith face.”

“What’s that even supposed to mean.”

“That’s the face you make when you are fantasizing about him taking you to Sephora because no, you don’t hate him, you like him. A lot, actually.”

“Hunk! How dare you make me _hear_ that with my own two ears? This is straight up lancephobic. And don’t even mention Sephora, because the day I run out of my ABH clear brow gel I’m ejecting myself into space.”

“Lance, you know I’m right. We’re right. Even Pidge noticed. And if an emotionally stunted kid notices, you have to admit you’re being kinda obvious.”

“Am not.” Shit. Was he being that obvious? Had Keith found out too? Was it too late?

“It’s okay,” Hunk seemed to pick up Lance’s look of panic, “I don’t think he has realized yet, though. He’s like, super focused on leading now for some reason? But you two seem to be doing fine, right? He’s all smiley know and he laughs at my jokes, I love Galra Keith.”

“Hunk, as funny as that is, stop calling him that, you know Keith hates that…”

“Yeah, you know I hate it, Hunk.” Keith seemed to have materialized out of nowhere in the kitchen where Hunk and Lance were cleaning. _Wait, what? How long has he been listening? When had he even walked in?_

“Oh, okay. Sorry, Keith.” Lance and Hunk exchanged worried looks. _Good job, Hunk. If he hadn’t realized, he knows now. Great._ He could almost hear Hunk telepathically screaming “I’m sorry man!!!!!!!,” exclamation points included.

“That’s alright.”

“Actually, I’m done over here, so yeah… I’ll see you guys later, bye!” Hunk took his chance to flee the scene. _You, traitor_.

Doubt was eating Lance alive. Had he listened to the whole thing? Would that ruin the team? Would that ruin _their friendship_? He needed to clear this up.

“Listen, Keith, about what Hunk said just now…”

“Oh right. I… wasn’t actually listening. Sorry. I’m… kind of tired. Should I have?”

 _I want to thank not only god but also Jesus. I can’t believe I was actually worried about him overhearing. God, he’s so oblivious it’s actually adorable._ And, oh, Keith said he was tired. His dark circles just keep getting a darker shade of purple every day. But… it kind of compliments his eyes? It’s not like Lance had ever had time to stare at Keith’s face, but he had really pretty eyes. They weren’t dark brown, they looked almost black, no, they were… _is that a hint of purple?_ His eyes looked like the prettiest galaxies Lance had ever seen but as much as he’d love to keep looking at them, he realized Keith was now frowning. Oh, right. He had said something, something that Lance _could_ have caught if only he hadn’t been daydreaming about Keith’s eyes. _Okay, let’s just… nod and hope he doesn’t ask any questions._ So he nodded. But Keith looked even more confused.

“Okay…? Then, tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

Keith sighed.

“Nothing, just forget it. Anyway, Allura said as soon as we are done cleaning we can take the rest of the day off so… yeah.” He looked kind of disappointed. What had Lance done wrong? Maybe it was just the lack of sleep getting to him? He looked… kind of lonely.

“Oh, okay. Thanks man.”

 Keith had only come to the kitchen to get some water to, Lance guessed, continue training, as he always did. Seriously, how could he even think of doing that seeing how worn out he was from not sleeping? Maybe his uncle instincts were kicking in, but this boy was in no state to be doing anything other than sleep. He had to do something about it.

He was about to leave the kitchen. _Think, Lance, think. What do you like doing when you’re stressed?_ Bingo.

“Keith, wait. Listen… you said you were tired, right? I’m also tired, and things have been kind of quiet for a while, so I was thinking…”

Keith raised his eyebrows.

“Uh, yeah so… I’ve noticed you’ve been kind of stressed? And I thought, what’s better than having a spa day to destress, right?”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“Just come to my room after dinner”.

* * *

 

Since Allura had given them the rest of the day off, Pidge took the chance to work on the lions' upgrades and overall maintenance. Shiro, under Allura’s orders, had used the afternoon to nap because, in her words, he needed to “chill” (“Seriously, who even taught her that word?”), so he walked into the kitchen yawning and… was that… bedhead? Hunk, bless his soul, had taken over the kitchen because, after a certain amount of time, plain goo can get boring. Under Coran’s supervision, they went shopping to a nearby planet, and boy were they all grateful. He had managed to cook pizza. In space. How cool was that? _That’s my baby, and I’m really proud._ Keith, as always, had spent the afternoon training. Dinner was the same as always, they ate, they hung around for a little and talked to each other, washed their dishes, and excused themselves to their rooms.

Except for Keith, who followed Lance as soon as he stood up from the table. They walked through the hallway in silence. He was getting nervous. He was going to be alone in his room with Keith, after all. And as much as he wanted to deny it, he was crushing on him real hard. He was pretty sure it was past the point of a crush. Scratch that, he really liked Keith. Hunk was right, and honestly, when isn’t he.

“Come on in, and take your shoes off” he said, as he walked into his room. _Oh boy. Oh boy. Keith is in my room. Good job, me. You’re the absolute madman._

“Okay, seriously. What’s going on?”

“I told you this afternoon! We’re having a spa day.”

“Oh. Uh, but… how are we going to do that?” Keith was actually showing interest? Lance couldn’t believe his eyes. Or his ears, rather. He was pretty sure Keith would have stormed off his room. Maybe the lack of sleep was really getting to him.

“Well, I’m glad you asked. In this very room, we have everything we need. I’m a beauty guru, Keith, I’m offended you haven’t noticed.”

Keith laughed while he sat on his bed. His laughing face was beautiful. _Oh boy_. Lance was blushing.

“A-anyway, do you have anything to tie up your hair with? That’d make things a lot easier”.

Lance immediately regretted even suggesting that. Even the thought of Keith in a ponytail was enough to make him make his Keith face™. _Please, say no._

“Oh, yeah, sure. Gimme a second.”

 _Okay, this is how I go._ Lance wasn’t sure if he was going to make it out of this spa date. Wait, date? Was this a date? Did Keith think this was a date? This was normal, right? He and Hunk always had this spa days whenever they were too stressed at the Garrison. He didn’t have much time to think about that, though, because he was too busy trying to avoid looking at Keith, because if he looked at him for too long, he would have felt forced to admit his mullet wasn’t actually that bad. The longer front pieces of his hair also framed his face beautifully. And his eyes. Oh no, not again.

“Uhhh, okay. Here, take this,” Lance said, as he handed him a headband, while trying to hide his blush because their hands had touched. “Okay, so first things first, wait here while I wash off my makeup”.

“Your makeup? You actually have time to do your makeup?” Keith sounded impressed.

“Yeah, but like, it’s not a full face obviously. It’s just brows and concealer because I’m not about that panda eyes life, no offense. If I’m going to save the world, I wanna look good while doing it.”

“So… your eyebrows are fake? Do you have no eyebrows?”

Lance could see from his mirror that Keith was getting too comfortable in his bed. Not that he minded, but he thought Keith would be a lot more serious inside his room given that they weren’t as close as, say, Lance and Hunk were.

“My eyebrows are real, how dare you. Not all of us were blessed with perfect eyebrows, though” he said, as he washed his makeup remover off. “Okay, come here to the sink. We’re starting! And put on the headband, I’m serious”.

And of course Keith was pretty even with his bangs pulled up. Who would have thought? Well, Lance had, and he was certainly having the time of his life. While he was putting on his headband, though, he caught Keith staring.

“W-what’s wrong?”

“Oh, no, nothing. It’s just…” He licked his lips. _This is definitely how I die._ “Your eyebrows are fine, I think.”

Lance laughed.

“You think? Well, that’s a relief. Thanks. Okay, now just, wash your face, as you’d normally do. Just plain water, nothing too complicated, right?” Keith nodded.

“You done? Don’t actually dry your face just yet. Gimme your hand”, he said as he grabbed his face wash.

He had managed to convince Coran his skincare routine was so important he could get sick if he didn’t do it every day, and the poor man had believed him and rushed to Allura to ask her about it. Turns out Allura saw through his lies but she was nice enough to provide Lance with enough products so that he could keep his skin nice and clean.

“What do I do with this?”

“Just… wash your face with it, man. Like, do circular motions with your hands? You never washed your face in your whole life?” He said, pretending to be bewildered. He had seen Keith’s skin, and no matter how good his genes were, it was dehydrated as hell.

Keith did as he was told, and then pat dried his face.

“Okay, now what?”

“You just… go sit on the bed and wait while I grab what we’ll need”.

Today was special, right? And he had told Keith it was a spa day, so they could, no, they _had_ to treat themselves to a sheet mask. He grabbed two of them. Allura had actually been really nice and he couldn’t thank her enough because Altean skincare was top notch. He also grabbed some cotton pads, his toner and some moisturizer. Nothing fancy, but he knew that that was already a lot for Keith.

He sat down on his bed, right next to Keith.

“This counts as bonding time, right?” He said as he took out a cotton pad and damped it with toner. “It’s just toner, you stay still while I do my magic.”

He patted the product into Keith’s skin and he felt the boy literally melt into his bed.

“What?”

“I said, this counts as bonding time, right?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe? If you want to?”

Lance noticed that question had gotten him kind of shy and he was sure he had seen him blushing. He laughed, mainly because he remembered how insistent Keith had been on that time he cradled him. Yes, he did remember, but he would take that to his grave. Teasing Keith about it was too much fun. Seeing him so riled up was cute.

“Now just wait for it to dry a bit while I tone my face, okay? And the next step is really where the fun begins, buddy pal comrade”.

Keith smiled. Today was really the best day of his life. And Lance #died.

“Alright. This is… kind of relaxing actually.”

“Well, duh, why do you think I suggested it? Here, grab this. This is the sheet mask you’ll be using. Just mimic what I do, it’s pretty easy”.

He took the mask out of the packaging and put it in his face, and then checked on the mirror to adjust it. Keith seemed to be struggling with it.

“What’s wrong, man?”

“It’s just so… sticky. It feels wrong”

“Just give it to me, I’ll do it. Okay, uh… could you close your eyes? I feel like, really stared at with those big galaxy-like eyes of yours and it’s making me nervous”

Now, Keith was definitely blushing. _Oh god, why did I say that._

“Thank… you?”

“Yeah, yeah, just close them,” he said, while adjusting the sheet mask on his face.

Well, Lance could finally talk to Keith without feeling nervous because he sure didn’t look one bit attractive now. Each sheet mask had a different animal design. Lance’s was a lion and Keith’s was a panda, matching his panda-like dark circles.

“So what do I do now?”

“You just chill for like fifteen, twenty minutes I’d say because your skin is crusty as hell, full offense.” He grabbed the mp3 player he and Pidge shared. “Here, just choose something, whatever’s fine. I think I have some emo music that you’d like”.

“Lance, I’m not emo.”

G note.

“So of all 500 songs, you chose the 2008 emo anthem and you are telling me you are not emo?” he couldn’t contain his laugh. He had expected it, but seeing how Keith’s eyes lighted up as soon as The Black Parade started playing was, well, an experience.

“It’s a good song, okay?”

“Well, I have to agree. Here, you can lie down if you want”, he said while adjusting two pillows againt the wall. “Anyways, now that we have agreed that this is indeed a bonding moment, can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.”

“Are you okay? I mean, I’ve heard you night after night pacing through the hallway and during the day you look tired as hell. Are you getting any sleep? I know the responsibility of leading Voltron was thrusted upon you and you have no other choice but to do it but like, I’m worried man, you know?”

Lance just hoped he wasn’t overstepping Keith’s boundaries. Yeah, they had gotten closer, but how much would Keith be willing to share?

“I’m… fine”.

“Really.”

“Really, I promise.”

“Listen, we can’t bond like this. I’ll go first, okay? You ask me something, I’ll answer. And then, you answer me. With the truth.”

He looked into Keith’s eyes. He wanted him to know that he was genuinely worried about him. Even though he was no Shiro, he could also rely on him.

Keith hesitated for a moment.

“Fine. Are _you_ okay?”

“I’m as okay as I can be while being eaten alive by insecurities while trying to save the whole universe knowing I may never see my family again and that I’m not a valuable team member. You’re next.”

Keith was silent again. Shit. Had that been too much? Too personal? Maybe he’d scared Keith off. _Good job, Lance. He’ll never want to hang out with you again. Way to go._

The whole time, none of them had been looking each other in the eyes while they talked, but now Keith was facing him. He didn’t look horrified, or shocked. If anything, he looked worried.

“Lance,” he said in the softest voice Lance had ever heard him in, “Listen. Right now, if I were Shiro, I’d be probably about to give you a pep talk but that’s… really not my thing. But I’ve told you before. You are as important as everyone else. I know you doubt yourself, because I do too. I literally have to lead a giant monster made up of lions which is the only thing that can defend the universe. That’s crazy pressuring, if you ask me.”

He looked away for a moment, looking for the right words.

“I really didn’t want to pilot Black because I can’t be Shiro. You’ve all seen me. I’m impulsive, I don’t think about consequences, I’m not made to lead. And about what you said earlier… I don’t usually get much sleep, but… you were right. I haven’t really been sleeping. The whole leading situation got me really stressed because I just keep thinking of how to be a better leader and I can’t really think of anything.”

Lance was speechless for a moment. Both of them were struggling about similar things. They weren’t so different from each other. Maybe they could even… help each other out. The whole spa day destressing thing was nice, but what Keith actually needed all along was someone he could confide in. And Lance decided to become that person. Not because he liked him, but because he could tell Keith was actually trying to better himself. Yes, Keith was hot-headed and quite proud, but he was willing to admit his ways were wrong and was trying to change them, and to Lance, that was impressive and rather inspiring.

He realized he had stayed silent for too long.

“Hey man, listen, I think you are handling what you’ve been given pretty well. At the beginning I was completely against you leading us, but I think you have been improving quite a lot, you know? So, no need to be so stressed,” he was facing Keith now, too, and smiled to him.

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, totally. Leader.”

Keith smiled. Again. His smile was so soft. Even though his face was covered in a panda sheet mask, he looked so soft. The sheet mask. Right.

“Okay, time to take these off, mullet man. Give it to me after you’re done so I can throw it. Also, rub whatever product remains into your face and neck, too.”

Sheet masks were really miraculous. Keith looked much more relaxed, his skin look like actual baby skin and even his dark circles were less prominent. _Oh no, he’s attractive again. Focus, me, focus._

“Are we done?” Keith asked, but he showed no intention of standing up from Lance’s bed.

“Uh… of course not? There’s still one more step, and it’s actually the one step your dry-ass skin needs the most: moisturizing.”

“I’ll apply it on your face because, no offense, but I don’t want your fingers all over the stuff that makes me look like an Adonis,” he said as he took the lid off and started applying the product to Keith’s face, “also close your eyes, I don’t want you staring at my beautiful face”.

 “Suuure, keep telling that to yourself”

“You come into my room, use my products, vent to me, on the day my daughter is to be married, and you…”

“Wait, what? What are you even talking about? What daughter? What?”

“You being so confused is funny as hell but I can’t believe you haven’t watched The Godfather? Keef, boy, did you live under a rock your whole life?”

“Well, I did live in a shack in the desert for a year.”

“This isn’t even a new movie! Keith! We’re watching it next time, you hear me?”

Wait. Next time? Was there going to be a next time? He could tell Keith had enjoyed himself but he wasn’t so sure he would want to repeat it. And Keith not replying wasn’t really helping. Lance had finished moisturizing his face but his eyes were still closed.

“Hmm? Lance? Are you done? Can I open my eyes?”

“No.”

“What? Why?”

 _Because I’m too embarrassed to face you right now, you idiot._ Keith looked, as expected, absolutely stunning with well treated skin, hair up and bangs pulled up. That wasn’t fair. This wasn’t doing Lance’s crush any help.

“Just. Wait. Until I tell you”.

“Okay. Uh, and Lance?”

“Yes…?”

“I’d actually like to see it. Next time. That is, if you want to. We don’t have to. If you don’t want to. But. Yeah.”

 _That was so cute, holy shit. Thank god he can’t see me right now because I would die_. If only Keith could see his face right now. Lance thought Keith had been acting softer, but now he definitely _looked_ softer. The way he actually sounded nervous and… even shy was so cute. _Oh my god._

“You can open your eyes, mullet boy. And okay, it’s a date.”

“W-what?” said Keith after opening his eyes, looking quite startled.

“I’m saying I’m okay with it, we can watch it next time. No sheet mask though, I’ll run out of them quite fast. I think I’ll ask Allura if she could give me some more.”

“No, I mean, you said… date.”

“I didn’t”. _Fuck, did I? I can’t believe I just ruined everything._

“Oh, okay. Maybe I heard wrong. I am pretty tired, to be honest. I think I’ll just go to sleep, if you don’t mind,” he said as he stood up from Lance’s bed.

“Yeah, that’s alright, skincare routines do make you pretty sleepy because they are super relaxing, so I get what you mean.”

“Alright, see you in the morning, Lance.”

“Goodnight, man.”

“Goodnight.”

As Keith exited his room, Lance launched himself into his bed. He really couldn’t believe his luck today. He had been _so_ closed to ruining everything, but had managed to recover pretty quickly. All thanks to how oblivious Keith was. Bless his heart.

Not only had Keith willingly spent time with him —and they had gotten along quite good— but they had already made plans for a next time. Those were good news, right?

All he had to do was just ignore his feelings.


End file.
